recklessly dreaming

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Originally uploaded by .

comes out november 2

its rebelling. and i am sleepy and coughy. I know coughy isnt a word. I am not quite at the going to visit a doctor point - just in the this is getting old point.

i voted. when will i get to stop seeing commercials about it? i have had several comments about my God is not a republican bumper sticker - it makes me kinda chuckle.

and trying to minister in the silence…. sounds like a book I once … never mind.

These last few weeks have been sleepless, or when there is sleep it is restless sleep. I have never remembered having dreams (i can count on one hand the number of times that I can recalling any portion of a dream upon waking up in my entire life) but recently, they too have made for restless sleep. Tonight I laid in bed but to no avail.

I can cognitively know about the silence of God - and the examples of, the formation, etc, etc. But finding oneself in the middle of it is another thing in its entirety. And it is where I currently find myself. It is a place that is familiar to several of you – and some of you I’ve seen you sit here.

To be in a place where others around you are not in the silence, and at times you are the vessel through which God is speaking to others. Yet to still be in silence. Not the silence that choose to ignore it, or of prideful pseudo-humility but genuine silence.

The place where there is no “willing” on your part to change the silence. The place where the duration is unknown. The door of questioning, uncertainty, reflection and transformation. A place of desertedness and solitude.

Where I find myself now.

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Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

This is a tree. Note the colors. Here the leaves change colors (green, red, yellow, brown) before they fall to the ground. These are not shrubs but trees!

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Originally uploaded by jrogttu.

in the backyard of our campus center