like a missing piece to a puzzle
It all begin with something deep in me knowing there was an email to be sent (Yes, for all of you Strengths people I have Self-Assurance - so you know the role of the deep inner voice). Couple that with preparing for a devo rooted in Colossians 1. Then mix in reflection of what my call to ministry has looked like and where it has taken me.
I addressed the Pepperdine student body tonight for the first time at the All Campus Candle Light Devo it was if a piece of my ministry that had been forced to be dormant for so long was allowed to be used for the first time. A piece that I have always known was there, a piece who I questioned if I’d get to ever use, a piece that fit in ways I couldn’t have imagined.
There are many other pieces to my ministry that have gotten much use - relationships with students, the occasional speaking at weekly campus ministry gatherings, writing and leading small group/bible studies, planning retreats, planning worship, integrating arts into worship or study.
It’s a feeling similar to what Jen Hale blogged about. Unless you’ve experienced a piece of it, it is hard to explain. And it is not something rooted out of speaking in front of a large group, I’ve done that before.
It is about something feeling very right. It is about a piece you’ve always known existed, but have never been allowed to bring out. A piece that you’ve questioned if it is really true. A piece that you’ve wondered why it is yours. A piece that never seemed to have a place - or maybe seemed to be to a different puzzle altogether.
Tonight the piece was allowed to be brought out into public. Tonight it was able to be shown. Tonight it was able to be used to speak truth - to speak to specific students. A piece that I was able to bring by getting out the way and being used. A piece where I found myself (as the other Jen puts it) - “something (looking back, most certainly it was the Holy Spirit) absolutely overtook me and the words of God just poured out of me.”
A feeling of rightness. Not of perfection. But of a piece at last being able to find its place alongside the others. A piece that with the others is part of a larger life of ministry.